gasping for air

This is day three that my son has been attending one kick butt art camp about 2 hours away from our house. I stay at his camp (not with the kids but all by myself in a closed room that is now labeled “heaven”) during the day and visited my mom’s house to sleep at night. Tonight I go home. Tomorrow I spend the entire day with my kid again, and do that over and over and over…into what feels like infinity.

I’ve had roughly 6 hours x 3 to myself during these three days. To work, to paint, to have a thought. It is like they put the oxygen mask on the blue-faced woman, gasping for breath. I am indeed breathing, creating, relaxing. Relaxing so much in fact that I realize how exhausted this mama has become. The crazy bone numbing exhaustion is incremental, so went un-noticed by me.

More and more these little breaks will happen. My husband has been one wonderful heroic force since his job ended. But I imagine these free moments to a stay at home working mother must feel like an extremely pleasant trippy drug, I WANT MORE, I NEED MORE!

CLOWN 1 by Vermont Artist Cathy Stevens Pratt

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